Is it ok to cut off family?
I recently received the question if it was okay to cut family out of your life. This was a struggle for me. There have been times I wanted to cut certain family members out of my life and didn’t because they were relatives.
However, a short answer to this question would be: YES.
If a family member makes you feel horribly about yourself or your life, related or not they should not be an active member in your life. Maybe you distance yourself politely instead of deleting and blocking numbers, but you are NOT required to take mental or emotional abuse/manipulation from ANYONE no matter who they are.
How do you cut off someone who is family?
Try to communicate before deciding to cut then off
One of the main reasons I didn’t cut off certain people is because I never made it verbally clear that their actions hurt me. So to randomly cut them off without warning may have seemed uncalled for and unfair because I never gave them a chance to stop. SOME behavior is obvious that it shouldn’t be accepted but people’s moral compasses run differently and I try to always keep that in mind unless they are intentionally and pitifully abusive.
Stop answering all of their texts and calls and simply explain that you need some space. Sometimes they may not readily accept that decision, but that’s YOUR decision and if they choose not to change hurtful behavior, their feelings about it means nothing. There have been occasions when I distanced myself from certain family members in certain times for my own mental health and I didn’t tell them why. If this is someone who makes you feel negatively but isn’t necessarily being abusive or hurtful, this could be the course of action to take.
Put yourself first and stand your ground
A lot of times people make you feel badly because you let them. If someone says something that hurts you, you don’t have to accept it or put up with it. You can leave right then and there and not return. Your mental health should be more of a priority than one family members hurt feelings. They will be ok but ignoring your mental health can have lasting effects.
I have come to the place in my life where ANYONE can get cut off within a moments notice because I refuse to be surrounded by negativity in any way. Some people put up with it because it’s “family” but I think that in itself is toxic. Blood isn’t always thicker than water and every individual who is selfish and hateful is always related to SOMEBODY. So if that somebody is you, whether they are family or not, keep your distance.
This is just my opinion, but I hope if you’re struggling with this situation you found this post helpful.
Would you cut off a family member if they bring negativity constantly into your life?